Good.

It’s been a few days since I pulled the plug on Augusta and I feel good.

Early Tuesday morning, I took a tear-filled, sleep-deprived Dailey Method class.  It was emotional to connect to my strength as I fully came to terms with the decision to quit.  At that point, the blog post was just a draft that I had sent to my husband, dad, and a couple close friends.  A few of my Dailey buddies were in class.  I shared the news with them and they were nothing but supportive.  Shed some tears, got some hugs and headed home to face the logistics.  It was difficult to pull the trigger but once I did, I felt completely fine.  I got a partial flight credit and a nearly full refund on my TriBike Transport.  I was able to cancel my car rental and I also saved the money I would have spent on food and swag during the trip.  I lost the full race entry and the full cost of hotel because the person I was planning to share with is still racing.  Whatever.  It’s nice that I got anything back.

I was blown away by the readership of the blog post.  People sure are intrigued by a quitting story!  I got some lovely messages and support from folks in all areas of my life.  Some of them read a bit like a pet or dear, distant aunt had died: “would you like to take a walk?  would you like to go get ice cream?” which is sweet and funny.  I have to admit, I was a bit put off by the suggestion of having a party on race day.  Like, a quitting party?  No, I’m good.  At the risk of sounding ungrateful for some of the support I received, several folks started to talk about success and failure which I did not address in my post.  I agree that I successfully learned new things about my body and my preferences.  I also agree that “success” and “failure” can have broader definitions than just whether or not I completed the race.  But really, I trained for something for five months and quit three weeks before completion because I just didn’t want to do it.  I wouldn’t call that a success worthy of party.  I also don’t feel like a failure loserface.  I feel like me.  With a LOT more time.

My own little quitting party.

My own little quitting party.

At this point I don’t have even a single [smallest unit of measurement] of regret.  It was absolutely the right decision and I’m already barely thinking about it.  Do I have future plans?  Of course.  Not quite ready to share them but I assure you, all this fitness and hard work is not going to waste.

Ever quit anything significant only to find that it’s totally no big deal and it’s almost like none of it ever happened? 😀

 

 

 

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One thought on “Good.

  1. earthedangel says:

    Wait, so let me get this straight. You changed your mind, and YOUR WORLD DIDN’T END?! Mind: blown. I was led to believe that once you decided on something you were locked in 5ever whether you wanted to be or not and if you somehow didn’t then everyone would hate you (read: me) forever instead.
    Whoa.
    😛 I’m glad that you got so much support, and that includes from me! I have adored reading about your progress, and I don’t think this was a failure so much as an owning of what moves you. I count that as progress, too. 😀

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